I get attached easily (let me explain) Thursday 09 May, 2013

 

I will admit it. I get attached easily.

I like getting close to people and getting to know them. It excites me! Not just men, women too. I love the experience of meeting people and learning them and building a new relationship with them. It’s amazing how a stranger can become an acquaintance and maybe something more.

I get attached by how nice someone treats me. The kind hello, or the second time we meet it’s more excitement because we “know” each other a bit better. The more you see/communicate with a person, the less and less of a stranger they are. Isn’t that amazing?

It’s no feeling like having someone get to know you, because you are new. You are intriguing. You are a mystery.  It’s also vice-versa when you meet someone. You are curious and want to learn more about the person. Maybe they can benefit you in the long-run. The have something special to offer.

I love the connection of learning a person’s personality. With each conversation their personality arises and makes me happy. This person is awesome, funny, kind, insightful, generous, and amazing! Where have you been all my life? I like you!

Liking a person – they give off positive vibes. They are a good time and fun to be around. Let’s be Facebook friends, followers on Instagram & Twitter. Let’s like each other’s status’s and pictures. Retweet! Write a positive comments underneath each other’s post.  I like this person. I think they like me too!

Now I don’t get attached like an annoying dog or kid who wants to play all the time. More like aI want to keep you around  “will you stay in my life” type of attachment.

Is it naive of me to think people will always be like this from the start until the end? Am I that gullible to think people care and will always care? Who knew the end would be the end so soon though. How things end as I got attached.

Attached to the possibilities of your kindness expanding. Attached to the thought of a kindred spirit. We have so much in common how could I not get attached? We started sharing great conversations and even memories together. Memories are what keeps my attachments stuck on tight like glue. I liked the memories we created.

Then something horrible happens.

The attachment feeling of the glue starting to wear off. The memories start to be replaced with disappointment. It always starts off slow and subliminal, you don’t even notice the detachment happening. It’s like a band-aid that is starting to peel, you can patch that right back on. Right? Wrong.  You didn’t realize the person you became attached to was slowly pulling away. Slipping off, revealing the scar you had from before the last time you got attached to someone.  Instead of revealing the wound, you ignore it and try to patch the band-aid back on. Maybe they didn’t mean it. They didn’t mean to slip off like that.

Here is the ugly side. People realize something when you are enamoured by them. They take advantage of the situation. They think you will always be attach. They have a sense of entitlement to your fondness of them. They believe they are in control and you are to submit to their charm.

This isn’t fun anymore. This person used to be kind, generous, sweet, interesting, funny and every positive trait in the book. They flipped the script. Totally opposite. I’ve been bamboozed. It’s was all for show.

We all should be wired like kitchen stoves, if you get too close you get burned. Since we don’t, we just get attached and burnt anyways. Ouch that’s my feelings!

I got attached to a person with bad intentions.

Intentions that were never meant to benefit me. I got attached to a self-gratifying person. Wow. This stranger became an acquaintance  who became something more has slowly became the enemy? How did that happen? I didn’t let this happen once either. This has happened frequently. Over and over. Over time.

It happens because I stay having faith that people aren’t all leeches. They they are genuine spirits with me seeking to know them, and them seeking to know me. If I am intriguing to them, then they have become intriguing to me. I get wrapped up in their story, their persona, their ambiance, their essence…I almost feel like I become apart of them. That’s how I get attached because a piece of me has become entwined within them.

I empathize, sympathize, I care and I share. How can I not humanly get attached after all of that? For once you are no longer a stranger, you are a part of me.When the betrayal sets in and I realize what happens a piece of me withers. Time & Attachment goes hand-in-hand. Memories shouldn’t be filled with disappointment. I shouldn’t keep repeating history. Attaching & Detaching all of the time. Creating memories and obtaining disappointment.

If I could attach myself to everyone I meet and keep them I would.I really would. Unfortunately that’s not the world we live in. We attach to the goodness, make memories, someone drops the ball and disappoint, sadness kicks in – and then slowly detach. I told you I get easily attached- I never told you how easily I could detach though. Just know it’s not easy, but it gets done.

I let go if I have to, but deep down I don’t want to. Remember that.

*Disclaimer: This post was written with no one in particular in mind, rather a conglomerate of people who I’ve attached to in this lifetime. Also inspired by everyone who has felt the same at one point.

Your Favorite Blogger,

About the Blogger - Kiwi the Beauty


I am a not so typical, unstereotypical 20something year old lady who is trying to make my mark on this planet. This blog has many aspect through my visual perspective through photos, words & wittiness. I am highly creative, I love to socialize, and also a social media butterfly. I don’t follow trends, I create them.


6 Comments

  • alexia says:

    Love it I know we are kindred spirits well put!!!

  • Raisa Lefe' says:

    This really spoke to me! I thought I was weird because I get attached so easily (friendship wise). I had a friend slowly and randomly slip away a few months ago–someone who I thought I’d be besties with, raise our kids together,etc. Then all of a sudden the calls stopped. Then I saw her husband post pics of their daughter’s bday party that we weren’t invited to. I knew then that it was over and done. But much like you, I can detach, I just usually want to know why the separation happened-especially as I’ve gotten older. Thanks for this post-it was comforting.

    • I am so happy you could relate. Yes I am happy you were able to recieve ths from an angle from friendship. As I said in the blog this isn’t an attachment just in a relationship but it could be with anyone. It’s sad because the human connection should be genuine but it can be hurtful especially if you get too close. You get too close to some you burn yourself. Thanks for reading and relating Raisa!

  • Inthethickofher says:

    I think im attached to your style of writing and expressing yourself. A lot of women express themselves but dont know how to open their hearts. May be scared of being hurt or scared of rejection or how one might receive them being open but i do love how you do what you do. I dont read many ppls blogs but this one is like an open diary. I agree with the majority of this post and share the same sentiments when it comes to feeling attached but i do find it extremely hard to detach. Friendships and relationships the same, my letting go hurts and sometimes changes me or makes me more caution or standoffish, but im always willing to give new ppl the benefit of doubt. Love the post though friend.

    • Thanks for reading! Yes my blog is intended to be similar to that of an open diary. I am the same I always try to give new people the benefit of the doubt. I can’t let a couple bad apples spoil the bunch (how cliche I know). I actually like being attached to people, it’s the detachment part I hate. That feeling I can’t trust tht person anymore and I wanted to be open, but now I have to lose up again. That sucks because I think we all want to be open and vulnerable, but people have been hurt too many time to allow that.


Trackbacks and Pingbacks

Leave a Comment


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *