{Love + Dating Post} Shoutout To My Ex Monday 23 June, 2014

Ok this is going to be an interesting blog post. Let’s talk about ex’s…our ex-men. Similar to the popular Marvel Comic, X-men, ex-boyfriend/lovers can be quite comical (see what I did there?). For a lot of us bringing up an ex is a negative space that we want to push into the far back of our mind or even to the point where we need Will Smith to Men-In-Black Style erase our memories from that relationship.

Ex-boyfriend Eraser

I’m going to get a tad bit personal, because I ‘ve been kind of coy about my personal life and give a shoutout to an ex-lover.I don’t talk about my love life on my blogs or barely on any social networks because quite frankly, it’s no one’s business. Not trying to be rude, so let me explain. When you are in a relationship and it is broadcasted, somehow or another it becomes EVERYONE’S business who you are with and the status of your relationship. It seems like when everything is good people are inquisitive and then when things go sour, everyone wants to know what happened? So this time around, I’ve kept very quiet, to myself about my “dating life” because honestly if I am not getting married or engaged I really don’t want to overhype what I don’t know for sure is the real thing yet, and I have my EX (s) to thank for that. kiwi-the-beauty-shoutout3

I want to dedicate a whole blog to my ex, because this taboo subject should be full of boo-hoos and voodoo dolls with pins in them. The older I get the more I realize I don’t hate my ex, I don’t even dislike him,  and I am actually in a great space to speak about him. How did I get here? How did I get to the point of forgiving and living? Easy answer…because he was everything I ever wanted once upon a time. How do people bash and spew hateful words at a so-called “ex” when this was once someone you deeply loved and desired? I could never understand that, but have I said some hateful stuff in the past? Yes! Have I wanted to rip up all the pictures we ever took, make a burn book, and tell the world how much of jerk he is and warn ladies all over the world “Don’t Date Him”? Yup…but I didnt.

Ex-boyfriend Party

I’m not gonna sit here and have a Taylor Swift “Never-Ever Getting Back Together” party…because it wasn’t that simple. I, Kiwi, when I date I pick and choose who I want and it becomes serious and long-term. For me to bash someone that I loved with passion and affection is ridiculous. It make me look like an idiot because why would I date someone for so long, to ultimately hate in the end because it didn’t work out? Yeah I can hate that my heart got broke, torn, stomped on, and shrivel to the size of Mr.Grinch’s heart within an instant…but that doesn’t change the fact that I loved him. It doesnt change the fact of the memories that we created. Him & I…the journey and the happy memories I cannot erase. kiwi-the-beauty-shoutout1

I have to to realize this was someone who wasn’t just a boyfriend at the time…we were partners. We said the word “love” with meaning and truth, not because it’s what you are supposed to say. A person that yes we talked about getting married, having kids, and having a future because that was the long-term goal. This was someone when you associated him, my name would come up and vice versa for me. This is a person where our families expected to know about each other’s well being and even became apart of the family.

I am not gonna sit here and say that my ex and I had a fairytale relationship either. There were hardships, drama, people came in to conquer and destroy us – with their opinions to ultimately break us up. In the end, I think that is what happened – too many people got involved and time and other’s people’s rationale of how our relationship should be going broke us up along with a combination of other life occurrences. People stopped trying as hard, things taken for granted — and a little love lost because the grass has to look greener on the other side. The finale commitment to happily ever after was put to a halt because honestly…both of us weren’t mentally mature for each other like we thought. kiwi-the-beauty-shoutout2

We loved each other but we didn’t know how to communicate it to keep it going at the time. We were scared, confused and possibly selfish to love properly at the time. See when you are in love you love with your heart not with  your mouth or your eyes. It’s easier said then done, but I learn something. Love isn’t just a verb, it’s something that makes you feel alive. So with the happiness came the heartbreak – and both emotions made me feel alive. So I have to shoutout to you ex-boyfriend, you taught me the opposite of hate even after you. You taught me that love is still makes me alive, even if it’s without you. You taught me that my heart still beats, even if it took longer to heal than I thought. You taught be careful, maybe too careful because I ended up pushing away a few good guys because of what you did to me. You taught me that with or without you, I am still me. I loved being with you, but I love me single too! I forgot that sometimes, how to be single, just enjoy myself – that I didn’t need your relationship title to jusitify my existence (no offense).


Most importantly, I want to shout out my ex because he is human, not a bad guy – just maybe bad timing for us. Our personal growth and development was once in alignment and then it got off track…it happens. So shout out to you, once the love of my life and now someone who used to be a big part of my life and still has a space in my heart. I’m not bitter, I am better because of you. Thank you!

*This post was dedicated to one of my ex boyfriends. I didn’t say which one so…to whom it may apply to.

Post was inspired by singer Kissie Lee’s new song Shout Out To My Ex! Thanks for the inspiration girl, the video is too cute, reminds me of something Katy Perry would do!

Do you want to shout your ex out? Have anything to say to him if you could? Let me know!

About the Blogger - Kiwi the Beauty

Kiwi is the free spirited blogger and content creator of KiwiTheBeauty.com. As a digital influencer, she produces creative inspiration around beauty, lifestyle, media and travel leisure. Her life mantra is to make manifesting fun! When she’s not blogging, she is eating trendy hipster food, carrying crystals, making it rain at her local farmer's market and binge brunching. Follow her on her blog and social media at kiwithebeauty.com + @kiwithebeauty


Trackbacks and Pingbacks

Leave a Comment

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *